Giving Thankfully

Been wrestling with the word thanksgiving this week.  When I think of thanksgiving I think of this time of year, when we give thanks for all we are blessed with.  I have a roof over my head. I am thankful. I have food on my table. I am thankful. I have clothes on my back. I am thankful. I have family and friends. I am thankful. Paul tells us to "give thanks in all circumstances." So... this time of year we pause to give thanks...

Here's my struggle... When we take out special time that is designated to do something we make sure we do that thing really well during that time.... BUT, it takes the emphasis off the fact that we should ALWAYS be doing that thing whether it's during that special time or not.  Make sense? It's spirit day at school... we go all out painting our faces and dressing up. Shouldn't we always have school spirit though? Not just on spirit day?  It's Mother's Day. We honor our mothers.... Shouldn't we always honor our mothers?  Valentine's Day... We share love with those that we love. Shouldn't we always show them love?  It's Thanksgiving day... We give thanks for all that we are blessed with... Shouldn't we always be giving thanks?  Give thanks in all circumstances!

Makes me wonder if we are really grateful in the first place?  If we were really grateful, wouldn't we show it on a regular basis.  And if we were really grateful for all that we have wouldn't we notice how little others around us have? And if we really noticed how much we have in view of how little those around us have don't you think we would do something about it? You see? If we were really grateful for how blessed we are we would be anxious to bless others... 

So... Maybe Thanksgiving's focus shouldn't be so much about sitting around a table gorging ourselves on turkey and mashed potatoes while we thank God that we aren't in the same boat as those less fortunate than us... feeling bad for then... kind of... not bad enough to really do anything about it though... or else we WOULD do something about it. 

We do good... kind of... at giving thanks... But if we were really good at giving thanks, maybe we would start GIVING THANKFULLY... Thankful that we are blessed enough to be able to give. And I am not talking about just giving out of the leftovers... You know what I mean? Someone comes to the door on a can drive... so we go to the back of the pantry and find the dusty can of chicken broth that expired last year and give it away so we don't feel guilty for not giving anything... because a dusty, expired can of chicken broth makes such a good meal.  Or we donate the old pair of jeans or the coat with holes in it and stains up the front... We give our leftovers... What if God would had that attitude with us? They're not worth me sending my best.  They don't need my only beloved.  They ought to be grateful for this old nasty can of chicken broth from the back of my pantry.... Hmmmm?

This holiday season... I want to focus on GIVING THANKFULLY rather than just giving thanks... Because the Father gave thankfully to me.

Coach... Next Time Keep the Medal

Dear Coach-
     Tonight as we left basketball camp at the Y you handed my son a medal... You handed every kid a medal.
     A month ago at the soccer awards banquet you handed my son a medal...  You handed every kid a medal.
     Last summer at the little league baseball closing ceremonies you handed my son a trophy... You handed every kid a trophy.
     I just wanted to write you a quick note to say thank you, but my kid didn't earn those awards. He played hard, he learned a lot and he improved, but his team didn't win the league and he wasn't an mvp or an all star.  I appreciate you trying to make him feel special... like a winner, but he would of been fine without that bling.  He may have felt a little sad or disappointed, but that's ok. In life there are things that upset you and things that aren't fair.
     You see, my kid plays sports for many reasons.  One is to learn sportsmanship. Part of that is learning to be a good winner AND a good LOSER. Not everyone can win. Not everyone deserves a prize. I want my kids' coaches to teach them, to challenge them, to praise them and to honestly evaluate and critique their performance and I understand that sometimes that means my kid might leave practice upset or even mad... It's part of the game. He will grow from it. It will make him stronger. Ultimately he will be better off in life if he can learn that not everything is handed to him on a silver platter and that sometimes life is not fair and many times in life he will lose.
     I remember when I was a kid... 30 years ago... I found myself in the same boat as my son. We didn't win and I wasn't an mvp. I received a participation ribbon while the winners got trophies.  I was a bit disappointed, but I lived. It made me want to try harder the next time... to practice more and set goals for myself... Another lesson I learned, that I believe is just as important, is that I will not succeed at everything I do. I cannot be good at everything. Sometimes I will fail and sometimes I may need to focus my energy and time on something different.
     One of the biggest harms of handing every kid a prize is the attitude it instills in them... An attitude of "I don't have to try my hardest. I will still get a prize." An attitude of "I deserve it!" no matter how hard they try or if they succeed or not.  This type of attitude doesn't transfer well to the classroom, because if you don't study for the test you will fail... Not everyone deserves an "A" and when you don't get that grade the vast majority of the time it's your own fault, not the teachers!  This attitude doesn't transfer well to the workplace either.  Your employer will expect you to work... and if you are not putting in the effort you will not get the raise or the promotion... in fact you will probably get fired. Oh, and when you get fired, please don't get upset with the service organization who is trying to assist you with food or resources when they don't have everything you want or flavor or style you like. While they do want to help you, and they will do their best, you are not entitled to anything for free. Please be grateful for what you get.
     And ultimately, when all is said and done in this life.... not everyone wins. If you don't put your trust in the right place and follow the right road there are consequences... Know what I mean? The creator expects us to live in relationship with Him... He gave His Son, Jesus as the ultimate sacrifice for us... but we aren't entitled to that salvation as some seem to think these days... He does ask something of us... to follow... to deny ourselves and to take up our cross daily and to follow... and that doesn't come easy... and we will NEVER deserve all He has given for us... Someplace along the way we have to start living like it!
     So coach... When I sign up my son to play next season... I don't expect him to come home with a medal he isn't entitled to... It's ok to push him a little... I'm even ok if he comes home mad once in a while... If he has to sit the bench or even if he legitimately gets cut from the team, that's ok with me. He will learn some hard life lessons along the way and in the long run, he will be a better man because of it.
     Thanks Coach.

APATHEISM, Father forgive us...

(Disclaimer... I am not apologizing here for what I am saying, but I see the following attitude not as an attitude attributed to my particular church only, but to the church in America as a whole with very few exceptions. Not making excuses, just making honest observations... If this attitude weren't present in today's church, things would be VERY different in this nation. If you are reading this as a part of the church community I am directly a part of and ministering in, please don't see this as judgement, but, if you are feeling upset, it could possibly be conviction... The Spirit of God calling you to something more... Join me in this, what Platt would call, "Holy discontent" and don't run away with your tail between your legs, but step up and say, "Father, what do you have for me today?" and do it!)

Last week I was introduced to a term I had never heard before... APATHEISM... I’m not sure where I heard it. I believe it was while reading a blog or scrolling through Facebook, but I can’t get it out of my head.  Apatheism... a combination of “apathy” and “theism” referring to an apathetic view of God.  The idea that “ya, I believe in God, but I just don’t really care” that is rampant in today’s society.  As I’ve been thinking about this word I have been wrestling with some things:

1. Where does this attitude come from?

-Is it because we have been raised in a “Christian society” where people were just expected to have morals and belong to a church? And, since that attitude is changing in today’s culture (seems like there are more people who don’t go to church these days than do... the question isn’t “where do you go to church?” anymore, but “DO you go to church?”), people have just decided that it’s easier to just not care. 

-Could it be because real relationship with Jesus leads to life change?

-Maybe it’s because following Christ closely involves risk? 

-Maybe it’s just because they just don’t see the urgency of it... They don’t realize how important it really is. (Could this be the church’s fault?!)

      2.Is this attitude of apatheism just present outside the church?

-NO! I think a big part of the problem is this attitude WITHIN the church! When there is a need in church for a volunteer and the response you get is “I’ve already done my time”... that shows apatheism. “I don’t really care if there is a need. I’ve already ‘earned my salvation’” so why should I give up my study... where i’ve been for 30 years... after all I have to learn what the Bible says so I can live it out! (Problem is... by the time we know the book well enough to live it out, we won’t have enough life left in us to make it happen!)

Recently our church took part in the My Hope Campaign with Billy Graham... a campaign designed to bring Graham’s evangelism rallies into the home by hosting small private parties where a video is shared and an invitation to salvation is given.  We provided our church with resources and training... Over 350 names were written down of people we were praying for, who we hoped would respond to the hope of Jesus through this event.  

When the time came... apart from church staff and the church parties, less than a handful of parties were hosted... and the number of people who attended the church parties who didn’t already attend the church could be counted on 2 hands.  Why?  Is this apatheism? Does the church just NOT CARE about their friends who are living outside a relationship with Jesus? Or are they too afraid (afraid of reputation or rejection) to invite them?  Or... do we think we have done our duty just because we prayed? Hmmmm? 

And now that the “parties” are over the attitude I sense is “whew! Glad that’s over!”  No need to feel convicted anymore because the campaign is over. Too bad I missed my chance, guess I can go on with my comfortable christianity now.

I think you can probably sense my sarcasm and frustration.... You see? God’s call to follow Him and His call to MAKE DISCIPLES isn’t a call to participate in a campaign or a program... It is a call to deny oneself daily, take up ones cross and follow!  It’s a call to sacrifice... to give of ones self for the sake of another... It’s a call that doesn’t end but remains 24/7/365 until the day you die.... “Well, I did my time! I taught Sunday School for 3 years without a break!”  Good for you... Jesus did His time too... all the way to the cross!

Maybe we, in the church, are too isolated from the world. We don’t have any “unsaved” friends.  Then we need to get out into the world and MAKE SOME NEW FRIENDS!

Maybe we, in the church, are too comfortable with our lives... we don’t want to have to give up our big screen tvs and blueray collections... and we let our neighbors (remember the good samaritan story!) go without food and heat.

Maybe our church community has finally made it to a place where there are no major scandals or issues... we can’t let anyone into the inner circle who might bring problems with them! I seem to have read somewhere that Jesus came for the sick not well... hmmm?

OUR HEARTS are SO FAR from where God and His Word call us to be. We want what Bonhoeffer calls “cheap grace”... and as we seek after this grace without sacrifice we are dying inside and killing the church, the bride of Christ, in the process.

Apatheism?  Father forgive us... we know what we are doing, but sometimes it seems we just don’t care.