Oh What a Journey... for Dan

Life is a journey… full of ups and downs… straightaways and hairpin turns… quick, easy trips and icy, snow covered roads… Friday morning I set out from northern California for a quick trip to Portland, OR.  A 5 1/2 to 6 hour drive straight up Interstate 5 over a couple of mountain passes to the city where I spent 5 spent pastoring.  I headed out early on Friday so that I could beat the winter storm that was supposed to be coming in.  Everything was fine… some clouds and a little bit of rain… and a whole lot of thinking about the reason for my trip. 

I was heading to Portland to celebrate the life of a man who truly touched mine.  A man who supported me, encouraged me, mentored me, and invested in me.  As I drove I thought of the many conversations we shared… some good, some hard… challenging words… deep thoughts… Talks filled with laughter, wisdom, insight… Words centered on Jesus.  

I thought  of the time Dan gave me his son’s car keys so I could get him back for forking my lawn (Wes’s car got spray painted as a result… with Dan’s permission of course!)  I thought of how I always had to guard my plate when Dan was around because whenever we were eating together there always seemed to be food disappearing.  I thought of the picture of the General Superintendent I found staring down at me from the ceiling in my office one day… Dan’s explanation was “He’s watching you.”  I thought about the Sunday morning when I pulled up to the church to find Dan digging in the dumpster… Come to find out he had put a “TRASH” note on my computer monitor and the new cleaning service took him seriously and threw it away.  I thought of him tying my office door closed so I couldn’t get out and me stepping on his oxygen hose :)… 

Then I began to think about how brave he was… leading his church in Brentwood to merge with Central. All of the unknown he faced… What would happen to his people? His job?

I thought about how humble he was… Coming on staff under the leadership of another pastor after spending so many years as a lead pastor.

I thought about how wise he was… so many times giving me the advice I needed as the exact right time.

I thought of how caring he was… investing in a young pastor and his wife… Making sure we didn’t burn out and quit.

I thought about how strong he was… standing up for what was right even when it was hard and it hurt.

I thought about how patient he was… how much he LOVED God and LOVED others… How much he LOVED kids… 

I remember him giving up his pulpit and position to minister because that is what God called him to do.  I remember him spending months in children’s church loving on kids who just needed Jesus.

I began thinking of all the lives he impacted… at Central… At Brentwood… those students who he brought with him to Central from such rough places, but he loved them anyway… I thought even about those at Weaverville… the kids (including my brother) who he counseled at summer camps.  

Dan was an amazing man.  Despite all the physical struggles he faced every day he never complained. He just continued to follow God’s call on his life… His journey, no matter how hard (I am positive it was more difficult than he ever let anyone know) continued… He followed his calling to the end…

About then, on my journey, the rain turned to snow and the road began to get slick… I pulled off in Springfield to get some food and check the weather report.  It didn’t look good… The storm was getting worse and showed no signs of letting up anytime soon.  I decided to hunker down for the night and get a hotel room.  I was informed the service was postponed a day, from Saturday, to Sunday, giving me an extra travel day.

Saturday morning I woke up and waited… I wasn’t going to turn back… Dan was worth it.  The roads were bad, but it looked like things would thaw enough to begin the journey again soon… Just after noon I left Springfield and headed north… and it wasn’t so bad… the roads were wet and a little slushy, but much better than I expected.  Until I hit Albany… the slush turned to ice and the freezing rain began falling…. Then the traffic stopped… the trucker next to me said he had heard over the radio 5 semis were sideways across the road up ahead… *sigh… there was nothing I could do… so I waited. The hour drive from Springfield to Salem took over 3 1/2 hours… passing spun out vehicles in ditches and slipping and sliding even with the four wheel drive engaged.  

I stopped for the night in Salem planning to make the 45 minute/2 hour drive to Gladstone in the morning after things thawed a bit for the 2 p.m. service… I got into my room, turned on the t.v. and heard the news of the snow storm turning into an ice storm… “That’s ok” I thought… “I can still take it slow and make it in time.”  And then I received word that the service had been postponed again… until next weekend.  2 days… 300 miles away from home another 300 miles to get back… 2 hotel rooms, maybe 3… why? It was all for naught.  

But then I got to thinking… THAT’S THE JOURNEY OF LIFE!  Quick, easy trips and icy, snow covered roads… Not sure why you’ve covered the paths you’ve taken… Unsure if you’ve made any difference at all… Feel like you’ve just been spinning your tires and not getting anywhere, but looking back you’ve come a long ways… You’ve covered so much terrain… God called you to go and you went… You didn’t think you’d been making any difference at all, but lives were affected… people were touched… hearts were changed… and even though you may not have seen it, you were a hero to so many along the way.

Dan… You were a humble hero… following God’s call and touching so many lives along the journey… never seeking the limelight or promoting yourself, but serving… like Jesus… You once told me that holiness was about loving God and loving others… that’s it… and that’s how you lived.  I love you friend. Goodbye… until that day, over there… where once again I will be guarding my food. 

Trusting the Wonderings of Christmas

I wonder why…
     Why did Father do it the way He did?
          Why a baby?
               Why a carpenter and young girl who weren't even married yet?
                    Why the last available space in Bethlehem?
                         Why only 33 years on earth and only 3 years of ministry?

I've been listening to Winter Snow, by Audrey Assad and Chris Tomlin (check out this beautiful video of the song by Erik Rutgrink on youtube) and reading through Margaret Feinberg's Unwrapping Advent… trying to get my head around the miracle of Christmas and …
     … I AM AMAZED BY THE WONDER OF IT ALL …

I think the question I am wrestling with the most today is…
     … How did such a minor event in the grand scheme of things chronologically (only really 3 years of the calendar) have such an INCREDIBLE impact on the course of history? …

This Jesus, that came to earth in such a quiet humble way, has impacted
the course of time more than any other person ever …
    … about that I wonder…
          … and yet I trust…

I put my full trust and confidence in this baby and in the carpenter and the young girl…
     … I trust the manger and the ministry…
          …I don't get it… I don't understand all the whys… Why did Father do it the way He did?… but no matter the whys, I choose to trust the wonder.

What a Ride!

Today I came across a post from Mark Matlock titled Remembering Mike Yaconelli . As I read the post and watched the video (You can check it out HERE) I realized just how much this man who I only met once impacted my life.

It was the fall of 2003. I was attending the Youth Specialties conference just a few months after accepting the youth pastor job at Yreka Church of the Nazarene.  Yreka was the small town where Mike pastored Grace Community Church.  When I ran into Mike in the hallway of YS I had to say “hi” and introduce myself.  We shook hands and exchanged numbers so we could set up lunch meeting when we both got back to town.

Weeks passed and time got the best of us and tragedy struck. Mike was killed driving over the pass from Medford to Yreka the end of October 2003. We never got to sit down for lunch and talk Jesus.  But even without that meeting, God used Mike in my life in ways he will never know.

Mike was a pioneer of organized youth ministry. He paved the way for so many of us youth pastors.  He produced materials to assist us and organized conferences to encourage us. He wrote books about ministry and about grace.  He loved Jesus and loved students. He broke the mold of ministry to teens and brought fun... and grace... into the midst of it.  

I will never forget early November of 2003 when I walked into the gymnasium of Yreka High School, where Mike had served on the school board, for Mike’s funeral.  As I walked in Mike simple pine casket was at the center of the room... with stack of sharpies for people to write their memories of Mike right on his casket.  I sat in the bleachers off to the side and watched people walk in.  I remember seeing Brennan Manning whose books I had read and who I had heard speak on several occasions.  I saw Doug Fields whose ministry at Saddleback Church was admired by so many. Then there was Tony Campolo and Tic Long and ... and ... and ... so many heroes of faith and ministry.

The service started and I remember eulogies from family and from Tony Campolo, but then my heart was touched as Sadie... a young lady from Mike’s church with downs syndrome stood to speak... Through her tears she shared of how Mike had touched her life... Then there was a man who shared about the impact Mike had on his life using a mix of grace language and 4 letter words.  What a contrast from the youth ministry “hall of fame” that was present in the room!  It hit me that these people from Mike’s “private life” had little knowledge of Mike’s “public fame” in the youth ministry world.  They just knew him as a humble man and pastor who had shared the love and grace of Jesus with them.  My heart was challenged and changed that day... to see people through Jesus’ eyes... to love them through their sin... to see past the messiness of their lives (of my own life) and be a vessel of God’s grace... HIS HUGE GRACE.

Mike, in his life and even more in his death, helped me understand Jesus. Jesus abandoned all He was in heaven and became human so that we could understand grace... Do you get it? He created us... We messed things up yet He didn’t abandon us and start over... Out of His love for us He became one of us so that we could reestablish that relationship with Him. What love! What grace! What humility! What sacrifice! And those are the characteristics that Mike lived out every day!

And another thing... today I turn 40. Just a couple years shy of 20 years in full time youth ministry. As I reflect on where I’ve been I see God’s blessing in the lives of former students who are following after Jesus.  As I look ahead I see years more of ministry, leading more to follow Jesus. I really believe the best years of ministry are to come because as I get older, I get to know Jesus better... and some day I want to look back at the good times and the tough times, see the hand of God through it all and be able to say with Mike... “WHAT A RIDE!”

Thank Mike for being that living example of dreaming big, remaining humble, and blazing trails for God into the unknown can look like!  We are better off because of the legacy you left. I’m giving thanks for YOU today.

Knock, Knock... Who's there... Ghosts and Goblins Everywhere

Wouldn't it be great if somehow people would come to you that you could take just even a short moment to share Jesus love with them... not preach at them, but just love them... I mean, what if a needy kid knocked on your door and all it took was a smile to give him just a little glimpse of hope? What if you took it a little bit further and were to say "Jesus loves you"? What if you really loved them and handed them a small gift as a token of that love... say a piece of candy? What if you could bring just a little bit of light into their dark world?

Now... What if 100 kids all knocked on your door on the same night... looking for that hope and not even knowing it? And you were able to share your smile and your kind word and maybe even a small gift with them?... many of them with there parents looking on?! Bringing a little bit of light not only into the child's life, but the whole family's life!? 

Wait! Thursday is halloween... 100+ kids just may be knocking on your door... stepping out of the darkness for just a few small seconds into the light... What can YOU DO this halloween to shine a little bit of JESUS' light into the darkness of their lives? To bring them a little bit of HOPE in the midst of the storm... Hmmmm? Think about it... maybe Jesus is looking to you... I seem to remember something about... whatever you do to the least of these..........

MOUNTAINS, MOCHAS, AND MINISTRY

And the Boss said, “You are spending too much time in the office!”

What? Too much time in the office?!  How could that be? Right now on my desk are my lessons for the next 3 weeks of Sunday School, the message I am beginning to plan for “big church” in November, the material for the outreach program that is 3 weeks away, my small group stuff, the plans for our new discipleship ministries team, promo material for the webcast I’m hosting on Saturday, new devotional materials to review, and a to-do list that includes activities for young adults, teen leadership, youth outreach, and so much more! If I don’t spend more time in the office ALL THIS MINISTRY WON’T GET DONE!!  And I rush off to an appointment in a small town 30 minutes away.

As I pull into the parking lot of the coffee shop where we are to meet I receive the dreaded text message. “Pastor, sorry I have to cancel. Something came up.” Now, not only do I find myself 30 minutes from the office where I have a stack of work a mile high, but I find myself with 60 minutes of “wasted time” with nothing to do before my next appointment in this same small town.  I could drive back to the office, but by the time I get there it will be time to return... so I grab a cup of coffee and sit down... forced to take some time to... to... to breathe.

Finding a seat in the corner where I can observe the action and see out the window, the first thing I notice is the people... coming and going, doing their business... grabbing a cup of coffee or a quick sandwich before rushing off to their next appointment. After 30 minutes, an everything bagel and a cup of coffee I finally turn my head to look out the window... and I see it. Wow! What a view.  Just past the little motel across the street and through the trees with their fall leaves... is the mountain.  Not just the mountain, but THE MOUNTAIN.  In about a month it will be white with snow, but now at the beginning of fall just small white patches remain. I begin to reflect on just how firm and faithful THE MOUNTAIN is.

You see? Through the years and through the seasons the mountain remains.  The leaves change... the blanket of snow comes and goes... month to month it looks different... but THE MOUNTAIN remains.  Firm, faithful and true. I could never get used to seeing that mountain. And my mind wanders off to the mountain...

Then all of the sudden with the drop of a mug full of coffee behind the counter, my mind comes crashing back to the reality of the moment. The barista scrambles to clean up the mess and my brief daydream flees. My mind returns to the mountain of work that remains just out of my reach in my office a half hour away... but now I’ve been reminded of the mountain.

I realize the mountain in my life is JESUS... the firm, the faithful, the true.  The mountain in my ministry is NOT all the paperwork and plans piled high on my desk, but Christ’s call to GO AND MAKE DISCIPLES.  What that looks like may change with the seasons... maybe one method now and another method next year, but THE CALL never changes... so in the midst of the changing methods how do I remain faithful to the call? I get out of that office where the piles are high and spend more time in the coffee shop where I can engage others who are making the journey with me... towards THE MOUNTAIN.

Our Students Are Leading the Way

Each year the fourth Wednesday of September is a day I look forward to. Why? Because it's the day students across the nation gather for See You at the Pole.

This student led prayer movement is a sign of hope in a messy world. It shows me that there is still a generation who believes there is better direction than the world is currently going and is willing to stand for their God and for their communities, schools and friends.  It challenges me, as an adult, to follow their example and be bold about my faith. It reminds me of our freedoms in this nation, our freedom of worship and our freedom of speech. 

Each year as students gather to pray I give thanks that there are still students willing to live out Paul's words to Timothy in 1 Timothy 4:12 to not let anyone look down on them because of their youth and to be an example to the believers.  Thank you kids! Thanks for being JESUS today!

My Hope is in the Lord

“I can’t believe the school is teaching evolution! What about creation?!  What has our country come to!?!”

“What do you mean they are not going to display the nativity scene in front of the courthouse this year?!  It’s tradition! They’ve had that nativity scene out there every year since I was a child!”

“It is so sad that our government would pass that into law! I thought we were a Christian nation! Our forefathers would be rolling over in their graves!”

It seems like in the “Christian community” we are hearing more and more statements like these... Christians are getting upset because as a nation we aren’t what we used to be. Things are changing and not for the better. People are seeing the fall of Christianity in America and are beginning to get fired up.  I mean we are part of a nation that needs to step up to the plate morally and take a stand for what’s right! We are citizens of the United States and if we can’t come together as a nation UNDER GOD then we are all going to hell! Right?!?!

Hmmm? Just the other day my 6 year old was looking at a piece of US currency. He read the words “In God We Trust” and asked, “Dad? Why does it say that?”  My heart broke as I tried to explain to a 6 year old the state of our union.... where we once were, ... and where we are today?  Then I began to really mourn in my soul as I began to think about where we will be someday soon if we keep going the same direction.

As I wrestle with this today, the passage from Philippians 3 came to mind... as a believer my citizenship is in heaven. What does that mean? To me that says first and foremost I am a follower of Christ not country... my allegiance is to the Father, not the nation... My hope is in my adoption as HIS child not my elected officials... This is not to say that I don’t feel proud to be an American or I am not patriotic... I feel EXTREMELY blessed to be born in this country and I LOVE what we stand for as a nation. I just struggle with the idea that we have come to believe that God and Country go hand in hand... After all Jesus said, “Render unto Caeser what is Caeser’s and give to God what is God’s.” I respect and love my country and believe that we are the greatest nation in the world, but I cannot expect my country to take the place of God in my life. 

The bride of Christ is not the US of A... The bride of Christ is the church, and that is where my hope must lie!

Matthew 6:21 says, “Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” As a believer I cannot throw my moral investment into a man made government. My investment must wholly be in the Father... because where my investment is, there my heart is... As long as I am trusting in and expecting my government to do (through school curriculum or legislation) what God has called the Church to do, then I will continue to be frustrated and disappointed. 

So what am I supposed to do!?! 

As a follower of Jesus I am supposed to “raise up my child in the way he should go.” I must take up that responsibility! I am must be the chief influencer in my child’s life... and if every Christian parent took up this calling?! Our world would be a different place!

As the Church? You know all that energy we put into getting frustrated at what our government is doing?...  and communicating just how upset we are with our current leadership and how scared we are about where we are headed as a nation? What if we took all that energy and instead of focusing it on how bad things are, we focused it on teaching this next generation the values and morals found in Scripture? What if we taught them how to discern the Truth of the Gospel from the lies of this world?  What if we shared the HOPE found in Jesus Christ and grace we can have through a relationship with Him... 

What if we lived like our citizenship really was in heaven? What if we really were storing up our treasures in the right place? What would our world look like then?

The only way we, as the Church, are going to change the direction of the downward spiral our nation is on is to find our HOPE in the right place?  My HOPE is in the Lord! Where is yours?

Why Fight the Current?

As I sit here this morning my heart is heavy and my mind is wrestling with the Church and the church. The Church, big C, being the universal disciples of Jesus... all of us doing our best to follow after HIM. The church, little c, being the individual churches... the walls of our buildings that divide us for as many different reasons as there are buildings.... different locations, styles, types of people, personalities... different theologies, teachings, interpretations of Scripture. 

Here is the crux of the matter for me... Why? As Rodney King once was quoted saying during the LA riots of 1991, “Why can’t we all just get along?”  I know that was in a different setting and under different circumstances than the topic of this blog, but I think to the outside world, so often what is going on in the Church looks a lot like what’s going on during racial riots... a lot of unorganized chaos brought on by disagreements escalated to the point of fighting and unrest.  Could the world really be looking in from the outside and seeing a state of riot that they know they would be better off avoiding brought on not by disagreements between races, but disagreements between churches (little c)?

Now I am not saying that we all need to jump into one big ship and set off on the journey in some form of faux unity... But I do think that we need to join the same armada riding the current of JESUS deeper into the adventure and journey of God’s overlying story... maybe each ship has a different set of oarsmen, but they’re willing to travel together towards the same destination.  Make sense?!

To be quite honest I am tired of feeling the tension between churches and between pastors who each feel like their way is the right way and if I don’t jump onboard their ship, then I need to just walk the plank. I have no problem supporting and encouraging your ship along on the journey... in fact sometimes I think my ship can tag along with yours, maybe tying a rope to the stern for a season and likewise, I’m willing to throw you a rope through a season as well and then set you free when the right time comes, but I don’t think we all HAVE to be swabbing the same deck... although if you need me to help you swab your deck please don’t hesitate to ask. We need to remember as long as we are all riding the current of JESUS of the Gospels doing our best to follow God of the Bible, the one true God, then those tensions have no place on these seas!

This morning as I gathered over coffee with pastors from 2 other churches reading emails, talking through input and putting together the efforts of pastors from at least 7 other churches to organize an annual community wide youth event I got a picture of what the Church is supposed to look like. The focus was investing in the lives of the students who walk our streets with the HOPE and LOVE of Jesus Christ. Each of us leaders willing to lay down our own pride, sacrifice our own time and budgets, and set aside our own churches for a season in order to lift up the Church so that a student’s life can be changed for eternity. 

And so the wrestling continues... And as it does, the prayer effort intensifies... Why can’t the church see the Church and accept it for what it is? Each church (in their individual, unique vessels) riding the current of Jesus deeper into the story allowing the Author of it all to receive all praise, honor and glory... and because of it the world be changed.

(and so goes my personal contribution to National Talk Like a Pirate Day)

A New Adventure

Today I set out on a new adventure.  For sometime now I've known that I've had a longing in my heart... That uneasy feeling of knowing that you're supposed to be doing something but you're not quite sure what.  The notion that you were meant for something more... something bigger... that God's given you a voice and that voice needs to be heard but you're not exactly sure how to share it.  Well, that's where I find myself today.

I have a sense of uneasiness in my spirit that I've had for sometime. Not long ago someone (I can't remember if it was David Platt or Francis Chan) put a label on that feeling in my soul. They called it a 'holy discontent'.  You see deep in my heart, more than anything else, I want to seek JESUS with everything that I am... but I continually find myself wrestling with this messy world. I find myself wanting to be the best disciple that I can be. I find myself longing to lead others on the journey. Part of my heart struggles with the leading within the established church and its framework... the other part knows that it has been placed in the church and almost feels like its supposed to lead those within this established community back to the Jesus of the Gospel.

So here's the struggle... How does one stir up a passion for Christ in the midst of a world that continually drags people away from His call.  Good people with good intentions... even with hearts for God... being dragged away and enticed, by the evil one.  Boy, that sounds harsh as I write it, but it is reality. I think one of Satan's greatest tools against the Christ follower today is distraction! He's like the creepy guy in the van with the puppy dog and handful of candy trying to lure the young child away from his set path home from school.  He knows our intentions and our destination, but he does everything he can, through the busy-ness of life, to distract us from taking the next step on the journey. And as I look at my personal calendar and the lives of the people in my own church community I see that he is succeeding.  We are a people with all the best intentions in the world, but who struggle to 'take up our cross daily and follow' because we tend to get steered off the course towards JESUS by the candy in Satan's hand... and we don't even realize that it's Satan... "but the things I'm involved in are ALL good things!?!" ... and Satan knows it.

So the adventure begins... not the adventure of following (that started YEARS ago) nor the adventure of leading (been attempting to lead since the mid-90s), but the adventure making my voice heard... sharing the struggles with other like minded followers as we journey together towards Christ! .... through the world of blogging... SEEKING HIS LEAD... together on the journey.